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Not sleepy yet, so...

Just came back from collective.  Today I played 2 fast songs on the harmonium.  I haven't played on the harmonium for a month, maybe more.  Ever since I have taught Khai to play, I have since letting him play more.  I told myself, I prefer to sing anyway.  But I am good at playing.  

So, after so long not playing and suddenly playing fast songs, I have got RSI - Repetitive Stress Injury.  My right hand is really aching now as I am typing.  

I love playing the harmonium.  This is the only thing I feel I am good at.  Lately I have been feeling under attack and was having a tough week, just struggling to get to understand myself a bit more.  I forgot so many basic principles in my life until someone reminded me.  What was there to struggle in the first place when Shri Mataji is always there with me?  I may not see Her, but She is there, just that I don't feel Her presence because I am just too self-absorbed.  I was complaining that I was feeling this, that and not feeling good about this, that, when all this can be resolved by Sahaj music, a technique which I have learn since 2002.  It is such a powerful tool and I am taking it for granted, as usual.  I have felt the miracles, the joy from the music, the clearing that took place with Sahaj music, and yet I still ignored it.  I will start using it back and not sitting down and feeling sad and bad about it.

A good friend of mine said that I need to do things to be balance.  I can't just do nothing and watching TV is not good for me as when I am not doing anything, then I start thinking nonsense.  And when watching TV, I will think of those nonsense on TV.  So, if I am doing something, then it's harder to think, especially nonsense.  I tried that today, the whole day I was busy making Shri Mataji's birthday card, which will be presented to Her at Birthday Puja in Cabella this year.  Here's the result of it :

 

I didn't realise that to make a card for the Divine Mother is so difficult.  It's because I am trying to please Her and at the same time thinking that it should be representing ALL yuva shaktis in Malaysia.  Also, I am not very good with handicraft.  I am good at cross-stitch, but that's about it.  No drawing, colouring, moulding, pasting, cutting and so on.  Anyway, today somehow, the Swadisthan chakra was working very well, and in a few hours, I manage to finish it.  The whole time I was making it, I could feel my attention was only on the card, nothing else.  So, my friend is right, I should do more.  But, if I start doing things, then I become right sided.  But it's easier to balance myself if I am right sided than left sided, for me that is.  Because when I am left sided, I start to think of all the past and I cannot get passed it.  So, it's harder to get balance when I am left sided.

I was checking on my live traffic feed and saw that many visitors to my blog came from googling on Shri Mataji and harmonium.  There were a few that says, Shri Mataji, please help me.  

I don't know whether the posts in my blog answers your question but I hope that Shri Mataji will guide you.  My idea of having the blog is to share with people about my life with Sahaja Yoga. 

For Sahaja Yogis, I hope you will read something which you may find familiar or something that has happened in your life before.  Sometimes I will post Shri Mataji's speech, so I hope you enjoy reading them. 

For non-Sahaja Yogis, I hope you will get your self-realisation from here and experience a journey of self-discovery which I am experiencing now.  If you are looking for a meaning in your life, to understand the universe, to know yourself better, to be in a better health, to feel complete joy and happiness, then get your self-realisation first.  This is the first step.  So, no harm done.  Just try it by clicking on www.sahajayoga.org.

I am just a human being, trying to achieve balance in my life and to know myself better.  Sahaja Yoga has helped me very much and Shri Mataji has guided me tremendously, all FREE OF CHARGE.  So, this is one way I hope I can help to spread the message and tell everyone to try it too.

No matter which country you are from, go to the website and click on your country flag  There you will find out where you can get classes FOC. 

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