The Shakti Within

Since coming into Sahaja Yoga, I have always heard Shri Mataji spoke about being a Shakti.  

The woman of the house ( gruhlaxmi) is the shakti of the house. So in a way there should be a very deep oneness with her. When this gets disrupted then a woman leaves her wisdom and gets upset, and sometimes she can be like a bomb, will quarrel; by this a bad influence comes on the children and the society starts breaking. When society breaks then the children will break. All wrong things will come into them and they will go astray. And the discipline of the home gets spoiled. In the house where there is no discipline the children get ruined, the society gets ruined. - Excerpt from New Year's Eve Puja 1997

If she quarrels and argues with everyone then she is not a shakti. Shakti means that you can integrate with everything. The highest. Whatever happens you are above it all. Then you are the Shakti, but if you got suppressed then you are not the shakti. - Excerpt from New Year's Eve Puja 1997

You should not compete with men. What is there to compete with them? You are much better off. You are like the Mother Earth. You can bear anything. You can do whatever. You are shakti. What is there to dominate a man, and to compete with a man? I mean, it would be like a horse competing with the man who rides the horse. - Excerpt from 28 May 1985 talk

Till the purity and loving mother like qualities develop in a woman the Grahalakshmi Shakti does not get awakened in her. But she should be wise. Grahalakshmi has to be wise and intelligent. So we can say that when this Mahakali Shakti gets cool and peaceful it becomes Grahalakshmi. - Excerpt from Shri Adi Shakti Puja 1994

But the nature of women should be peaceful and glorious…..their shakti has that peace.
By becoming aggressive she looses her shakti. By her peace and love she can win whole world. Her walking, her talking, her dressing and style should all be just like devi(deity). - Excerpt from Shri Adi Shakti Puja 1994

Three kind of Shaktis are described. Comforter is the first on left side. Right side is councilor and central is called redeemer. These are the three Shaktis of Holy Ghost. So, when you enter into the central channel you become Sadhaka and Mahalakshmi rushes on you. Mahalakshmi blesses him. It is very difficult for the Shakti of Mahalakshmi to ascent because mind sometimes goes to left and sometimes to the right. - Excerpt from Shri Adi Shakti Puja 1994

You are the Shakti. You are the power. If you make your men cabbages what sort of children you’ll have? Cabbages only. Respect them. Make them men, enjoy their manliness. Then they’ll never give you up. There’s no competition between the two. - Excerpt from Shri Kartikeya Puja 1986

It wasn't until I became a wife, that I know the meaning of a Shakti.  Till now, I am not sure if I have grasp the whole meaning correctly.  I can see lots of ladies having this power and the Lakshmi power, especially Indian ladies.  

Nowadays, I find many mothers are not really a mother.  Quote from an uncle who is a seeker but went to a false guru.  But still his words were very wise, coming from his experience.  He said and I quote, "Many women are not mothers.  They gave birth and let others bring their children up.  Baby-sitter, relatives, grandparents, etc.  How many women actually bring up their child on their own?  All busy working."

This uncle had a very sad background.  He has 4 daughters but lost his only son when he was only an infant.  His son died from burns of hot water.  I didn't dare to ask further, whether it was cause by babysitters or what.  But what I understand, no matter how difficult their family life is, his wife never works and brought up their 4 daughters on her own.

I have to agree with his quote.  It's true that many women gave birth and gave their child to others to look after.  I was upset when I found that one of my friend's second child was with his babysitters 24/7.  My friend only 'visits' him but doesn't bring him home.  

With the difficulty in the society to cope financially, many women are coming out to work.  Many corporations are also more women friendly, by giving longer maternity leaves and flexible working hours to cope with family life.  

I myself was brought up entirely by my grandmother, aunt, babysitter and domestic helper.  Both my parents were too busy working on shifts, 7 days a week.  It was only when they have completely retired that we were able to spend more time together.

I did resented that my parents didn't spend much time with us.  But I understand.  The money they brought in gave us comfort and enough for us to live a comfortable life.  It was enough for us to have decent education too.

At work, I can see my female colleagues struggling to keep the family life in balance.  Most of them have babysitters, whether it's their grandma, mother, mother-in-laws or some aunties as babysitters.  They too struggle during weekends.  They want the best for their kids, but have little time to do so.  If they won't work, it's not enough for the family.

I would love to be like some Sahaja Yoginis who are full-time mom.  I would love to give 100% attention, 24/7 to my child.  But I know that's not possible, not for me.  I just pray and hope, that should I have a child, we will be able to bring him/her up in the Sahaj environment as much as possible, be with yogis as much as possible and does not lack love from us.  I hope we will be the first person he/she sees every morning and the last person he/she sees every night.

Mother's love is very important especially growing up.  

It was only until my mom has been confined within the hospital walls that I felt the lack of Shakti power in me.  The tasks and chores that she one person did, took 3 of us to do and yet we can't do a better job.  So here I learned.  Woke up early to boil soup.  Cook my nephew's porridge and breakfast.  Packed my lunch.  And still managed to footsoak before going to work.  Since I finishes work late, hubby have to pack dinner.  No time for cooking.

But we managed.  Just not that well.  The soup was tasteless.  The vegetable was too salty.  The rice was too much.  And we were all so tired by the end of the day.  So much more to learn.  When my mom is discharged, I will learn how to cook.  Find out the ingredients that she put in the soup.  

Still learning to be the shakti within.  Life long education.