Going with the flow

Everything is happening too fast.  I am not sure whether this flow of the river is going to flow deeper into the threacherous sea or just gently flow into a beautiful waterfall.  We just don't know what is in front of us.  We only know what is happening now and it's just very cool.  Maybe the sea is as calm as a cow and not as threacherous as we thought.  And maybe the waterfall is too high and filled with rocks.  We really don't know what is there waiting for us.

Now and then, on and off, I will wonder, whether I am heading to the right path.  With Shri Mataji holding my hand and guiding my each step, I don't fear in my heart (not anymore) but my head is telling me to go slow.  For I take 1 step forward, and will take 3 steps backward.

Seems like everything is falling into the correct places and and the vibrations on the Sahasrara proves it all. 

But still, is this an illusion?  Is this a test?  Is it true that every happy moment is only temporary and will not last long?  Will I fall and drown?  Or will I rise to another level?

It's all very new to me.  Tiptoeing on egg shells.  So careful so that they would not break. 

Best is to just go with the flow, wherever the water brings us.  For we do not know what is in the future.  Like someone said, even if it is not the right path, what harm can it make?  No regrets, only gain experience.

I hope I am as surrender.  For every single second, my mind is telling me something else.